Kaleidoscope

I’m thinking it all started with a wish,

A happy one at that.

365 days prior,

I typed my heart out.

 

I remember wanting that first one unique,

Something out of the blue,

Something a lot like me,

The very talkative geek.

 

But now I read it again,

Thinking it was all very genuine and real.

I’ve written many words since then,

Describing you in every shade of teal.

 

So thinking back at it all,

Maybe it started with that meet up,

In restaurant characterised by the sea,

At a time where I really felt completely free.

 

..I used to hear your name and shyly smile.

 

Because in my heart, it lighted a flame;

And it ignited a fire of sleepless nights,

Lost with my heart skipping a mile after a mile.

And yes,

I know that you’re not to blame,

But for me to get that…

It may take a while.

 

You know what is it that I miss?

 

I miss the boy with the ambitions.

I miss the artist with the aimless brush,

The one who wanted to draw worlds with his own conditions.

Because that-

That was the boy I fell for.

That was the you that daily made me blush.

 

Do you know what’s a Kaleidoscope?

It’s what they call a group of butterflies;

It’s what gave me daily hope.

They’d flutter by each time we talk,

And I ask what if I suddenly on that choke?

But hey that’s me,

I ask crazy questions all the time,

And you’d reply with answers that rhyme.

 

I knew too much and too little,

And I always wanted more.

Then we stopped talking,

And the bond went a tad brittle.

But that’s okay, I guess,

It’s not like we’d clean the mess.

 

Had I lost the signs or were they right there?

And when did we agree to part ways?

Because I never got to say goodbye–

Never saw the ‘good’ in there.

I knew life got us caught up by,

But give me an instant where that’s fair.

 

Yes you rode the waves,

And yes I surfed mine too.

But hadn’t I waited for you by the shore?

What else could I’ve done more?

Alone, you built your caves,

And alone, I sat there without a clue.


Hey there beautiful people!

Since good Ol’ Sir Valentine is upon us, I thought I may as well present my own share of chocolate here with this sad love poem. What did you think? My heart kinda broke with that last stanza there, did yours too?

That aside though, allow me to say: Happy Valentine’s Day; and may the odds be ever in your favour!

#ForeverASinglePringle

Midnight Ranter (aka Ayaka)

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Corrupt Me–Blog Tour/Book Review

Three words: That. Was. Intense.

 

 

Howdy ladies and gentlemen!

Alright, so this review is a definite step out of the comfort zone for me; primarily because this book is a New Adult one, a genre that I don’t journey often– perhaps ever– and also because this book was my first ever ARC! The excitement of that alone is a tad overwhelming. But with all that said, I would like to thank the wonderful author, Jillian Quinn–who is one of the sweetest humans on the planet–for giving me the opportunity to review her debut novel. You can find more about her on her website: jillianquinnbooks.com or simply give her a visit over at her blog! Yep, she’s a fellow blogger too! Check it out here.

So let’s see what the novel with the intriguing title is about, shall we?

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I have to say that the synopsis did interest me a bit; not because it has the bad-boy-good-girl vibe, but because it involved the mafia and the criminal underworld and that’s not something that I’ve come across often. Better still, it’s not your usual good-girl-bad-boy novel; simply because Isabelle–Izzie– isn’t a good girl. Not by a far cry.

As I said, this one came across as one hell of an intense read– everything was very heightened compared to what I’m used to. I’m certain, however, that it was a new trial for me, and I can’t say that I didn’t enjoy a few bits from it, like the food mentioned in this book, for instance. Now that was intense, alright (God.. just remembering is making me hungry).

I had a little issue throughout the book where I couldn’t exactly connect with Izzie. Izzie is a bit of a hot-head; someone who’d just go for it and pause to think about the consequences later after the deed is done. She’s rather athletic, smart, intellectual, and very confident in her adventurous lifestyle, generally. Compared to her, I’m in every bit her opposite; but I guess it was refreshing seeing how life would turn out for a character in a novel with those attributes.

I felt as though the relationship between Izzie and Luca was sort of purely physical. There was a definite instant attraction–but they did have a history, so that’s to be put in mind– but I didn’t see them talk about their feelings, really. Yes, in some cases action speaks louder than words, but it’s always healthy to converse too. Personally, I tend to gravitate towards that kind of subtlety, but our couple there preferred it intense.

I guess the book was more centred on how the two came to accept one another in their lives, what with each of them being so very stubborn and their own persons (does that make sense?), so the character development was highlighted there. Luca came across first as your typical hot and irresistible male love interest, but I loved his relationship with his Mother. I liked how he always acknowledged Izzie’s strength and admired her for it; so where I previously would’ve rolled my eyes a bit at the general attention that guy attracted, I now know where the appeal comes from– Luca is more that just a pretty face and I can see a lot of character growth for that guy.

The author’s writing style ranges from modern to classical descriptive, so in some instances it feels as though you’re literally listening in on the character’s thoughts, and in other cases, you’re reading a well-written novel; and that was a great thing to have.

If you want a novel with steamy scenes, a chemical romance with a touch of danger and a general easy-read, this novel is a great candidate. It showed me parts of the world that perhaps I wasn’t entirely aware of: it painted the wild college life and the temptations lust could present to us humans, and that definitely wasn’t something I thought we’d give in to easily, but this book proved me wrong. So it was definitely refreshing seeing all the wild parts us humans have suddenly unleashed on the pages.

Find more info about the novel here~ Goodreads . Amazon . Barnes & Noble


 

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More on the Author!


So is this your type of a read? Would you give it a go? Have you, already?

(Also also, how was my first official ARC review?)

Let me know in the comments below!

Love,

Midnight Ranter (aka Ayaka)

Being Blind

Hey there folks!

How’ve you all been doing? I’m hoping good Ol’ Jan has been kind to you– or at least, not very mean.

I come to you with a rather debatable topic today– well, I don’t know if it’s universally so, I just know that I suddenly found it debatable and decided a Rant should solve the issue.

So today my phone pinged up with a text from one of my mates. Curious, I check it to see a narration of a short passage with a moral behind it. The message was something like:

A man married a beautiful lady. He loved everything about her, but as with most attractions, he was always awed by her unearthly beauty, and every time he’d look at her, he’d fall in love just a little bit more, entranced by her charm. So when one day, after he left on tour, his wife developed a sudden skin disease, she believed that with that cursed disease, no one would love her any more. 
On his way back from the tour, however, he met with an accident, and although his life was spared, his sight wasn’t. And so began their new chapter as a blind man and a woman with diminishing beauty. 
 The woman’s love for her husband didn’t waver once despite the hardships that came with caring for a blind man, but, slowly, her disease started taking away her beauty, leaving her a withering flower that kept losing her petals no matter how well you tended for it.
One day, though, she died. Her death brought him great sorrow; leaving the man in a grievous state so deep it almost endeavoured him whole.
He finished all her last rights and wanted to leave that town.
A man from behind called and said, ‘Now how will you be able to walk all alone? All these days your wife used to help you.’
He replied, ‘I am not blind. I was acting,  because if she came to know that I knew that she had skin disease, it would have pained her more than her disease. So I only acted blind. She was the love of my life; and I only wanted to keep her happy.’

The moral there is that sometimes, it is for the better to act blind or ignore someone’s short comings, just to keep them happy.

Whereas I do think that this is a very touching story of what love is and what sacrifices we have to make because we care, I do have a little to add there.

It’s true that highlighting someone’s problem would not make them happy, but ignoring them wouldn’t either. Maybe it works for some people; but definitely not all. I believe that when we care about someone, we embrace them as a whole– with their ups and downs, imperfections, insecurities, quirks and everything in between.

What you do when you care for someone is help them out, not ignore their problems or pretend they’re not there. Yes, some issues can’t be helped, like that lady’s skin disease, but that’s all the more reason to let her know that it’s not the glow of her complexion that makes her pretty, it’s everything else.

My point is, don’t try to be blind for her, but maybe show her that you’re the only person who sees what the whole world can’t: her inner beauty, strength and soul.

Close your eyes and open your heart, I assure you it’d be worth it.

 

Anyone agrees with me here?

 

Midnight Ranter

Mystery (Rhythmical Rant)

Life is a mystery;

One that I’ll never really fathom.

Yet I still study its history,

Forming thoughts to help me imagine.

 

Rules change,

And concepts never apply.

Try as you might– you’ll still be strange,

Try some more, but by a corner you’ll still cry.

 

Should we care—

About the things people say?

Fight it fair and square?

Or let their knives deform you like clay?

 

And who you are–

Upon what is that based?

On what they saw described in your star?

Or everything else you once faced?

 

But then,

Hasn’t the past already departed?

Why look into it again,

When it’s the thing I’ve long since parted?

 

Why judge me on the first glance,

When it’s only what you just saw?

I’ve still so much to enhance,

And it’s my life— it’s what I’ll draw.

 

And yet,

We care about reputation.

When it’s a sad, sad threat,

Looming over every single nation.

Well yes,

It’s their word against yours—

Indeed, a fine game of chess,

But who is it to settle the scores?

 

Now I think I’ve strayed a bit far,

So let’s get back to the subject.

I’ll talk about the scar,

And in that, I’ll be direct.

 

People judge,

People hurt.

They’ll walk round and trudge,

Not caring about what they blurt.

 

So now it’s only up to you,

To give them what they need.

Hand over the glue,

And tell them we’re all a broken breed.

 

No one’s perfect,

But that’s the way it should be.

In everyone lies a bit of a wreck,

Mostly hidden under the sea.

 

And yes: life’s still to me unknown,

But that’s one down and a million more to go.

With that one issue finally blown,

I guess I’ll just have to take it slow,

And believe that truths will one day rise and glow.

 

 

Hullo!

What did you think of my rather rhythmical rant? Enjoyed it? Should I make rhyming rants a thing or just get back to bulky paragraphs? Which part did you relate to the most? The bit about the glue and the one about the sea are my personal favourites, to be honest. 

Everything aside, I hope you all have a lovely day and I look forward to your feedbacks~

–Midnight Ranter (aka Ayaka)

3 Days, 3 Quotes: Day 2

I’m starting to think that I may have commitment issues…. or maybe I’m just irresponsible..

I know, I know. This quote should’ve been here yesterday but.. I had this infernal paper to write and got caught up in it. My apologies, dear readers.

Speaking of Infernal; today’s quote is from one of my all-time favourite trilogies. Any guesses?

(Oh yes, if you want Day 1’s quote, it’s right here)

Another drumroll before the grand reveal, please:

*drumroll*

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This is especially true in my case because were it not for books, I would’ve been a completely different person compared to who I am today. So thank you books for making me choose to live a thousand lives instead of just one!

And the nominees for the day are:

  1. bookishthingsandtea
  2. rantandraveaboutbooks
  3. jessreadsbooks

Have you read The Infernal Devices trilogy yet? Can you relate to today’s quote as much as I do? Let me know below!

 

Signed,

Midnight Ranter (aka Ayaka)

Of Love I Speak

I sighed and stared up above,
Gazing at the moon.
Was there a story in my love?
‘Yes,’ whispered the gales later at noon.

I sat on a bench and read a book,
Smiling at the teens’ story.
Was there love from a first look?
‘Yes,’ whispered the gales with all glory.

Where was it?
Where was that feeling?
That one that made you feel all lit—
And with bliss on the ground kneeling.

I feel it all shattered,
Broken down into little pieces.
I sometimes even wonder whether it ever mattered,
Especially when I found nothing in its traces.

Of love I speak,
And of it I wonder.
Do we all feel its peak?
Or do we just sit and ponder?

Hullo my most beloved readers! 

What did you think of this one? Did it have you wondering about Love as an emotion? Of it as an experience? Tell me what you thought of it below because I love all of your comments and I look forward to them every time I post:) (they’re basically why I post, I think). 

Signed, 

Midnight Ranter (aka Ayaka) xx