I’ll tell you a late April’s lie, but I wish you could believe it because it has never been more of a truth before:
There came a time in everyone’s lives when we just lied back, relaxed under the sun, feeling it’s soft and warm kisses on our skins and thought, ‘Ah, that’s just what it feels like to be in love.’ That’s what most people compare love to: cosiness, gentleness, fluffiness. It’s this general summer-spring feeling; the one that makes you feel crisp and all warm from the inside.
I think that they are wrong. Or at least partially so.
The thing is; love doesn’t make you want to lie down and relax; it doesn’t just make you feel cosy and all filled up. It doesn’t. Loving someone makes you feel as though you want to do everything at once; and literally give it your all. It makes you feel motivated and energised. Loving someone doesn’t make you feel crisp; it makes you feel ignited.
And that’s what it means to love you.
I feel like the world is just a click away; that all I do need is just within my grasp; right by the corner, and the thing is: I don’t feel as though I just want it there, I feel as though I want to work for it. To do all that with my own effort because the outcome is just irreplaceable. What I mean to say is, you, my world, are always just a tap away; you, everything I’d ever need and want, are always there; you’re that light in my darkness, the right path in my maze and the good in a bad day. You’re all that and it took me that long to realise it.
So know that when I tell you to leave, I scream and say stay .
When I look happy when you’re gone, it’s only ever a smile I put on to hide my pain.
When I tell you that I hate you, I mean every word and synonym of its opposite.
That’s all because love is complicated and never simple; so bear with me as I unknot all these feelings I have for you.
Heya lovely readers!
As I thought, I did feel bad about the shortness of yesterday’s post; and since I’m not coughing at the moment, I thought I’d write a bit of a cheesy something for you all. Now see here, I love cheese but not a big fan of cheesy moments, but this one here is special: it’s a letter from one of my characters to another (nothing personal), so I considered sharing it to hear your thoughts. Therefore, I’d love to see all your comments on it and hope that you’ve liked my special cheese 🙂
Midnight Ranter (aka Ayaka)